I was talking to a like minded parent friend via pm the other day. She pm’d me after reading my post, yesterday. And she was, understandably, distraught that friends of Kelli were trying to blame Autistic people for this tragedy by asking, “Where were you?”
I agreed with my friend. Friends of Kelli have two choices.
They can either acknowledge that they have blood on their hands. They can acknowledge that they have created and nurtured a culture of deep hatred for Autistic people. They can acknowledge that these Autistic hating ways are what lead to Kelli’s attempted murder of her own daughter. And that they too are already on that very slippery slope which lead to the worst case scenario for one of their friends.
Or they can try to make this about anything but murder. They can pretend that this is about lack of services. Mental Illness. PTSD. Autistic people not helping way back when. Anything but the fact that they were part of the support system, the culture, that not only allowed this to happen but precipitated it.
But either way. This is rock bottom.
Some of Kelli’s friends have gone all out defending the murder and trying to blame anyone and anything but the people that are actually responsible for this attempted murder–Kelli and those that are part of the Autistic hating faction. These people seem not to realize that their bigotry and ridiculous are showing.
But I have to believe that there are others at rock bottom who are not actually the bottom feeders–they’ve just been sucked in and down. That they will recognize that they need to climb out of this pit of wretchedness and despair.
And it is to these people that I want to say…
There are people waiting with hands outstretched. Eagerly waiting to help you pull yourself out from that abyss. We’ve been here waiting the entire time. Waiting. We know that the bottom feeders will continue to claw at your legs while you ascend–try to pull you back into their sordid pit.
I know it takes courage and strength to leave that place. People can learn to take comfort in misery when it is shared. But you can leave.
I’m afraid for you. Really afraid for your child. Because there will be more Kellis. There will be more Issys. But if you start climbing out now–reaching for a place of acceptance and love and all of the honest to goodness happiness that comes with it, I know it will not be you. It will not be your child who is next.
I think that you know this to be true. If you are uncertain, please look at what I am saying my life is like. What other families, that have chosen love, have said that their lives are like. And then look at Kelli’s blog. Look at the words of those that are part of the hate culture. Despairing over Autistic children. Miserable. Jealous. Unhappy.
You’re already at rock bottom. Is that where you want to stay? Or would you like to come up here?